Noah Kahan-cert

In the beginning of summer, I gave myself two goals for the summer. One was to read a book (I am now currently onto my tenth of the summer), and the other was to see Noah Kahan in concert. Going into this week, I knew that he had four nights at Fenway, so I would watch the ticket prices and decide which price would be right for me to go.

On Tuesday, it was raining all day and had no sign of stopping. I had found tickets for $212, but I didn't particularly want to be wet and cold all night, even though I figured that it would be a memorable experience. (Every account of those who attended the concert said that it was a very special concert and cathartic/therapeutic to listen to the sad songs play in the rain.)

As a result, I waited to see what prices would look like on Wednesday. All day, I watched as much fewer tickets were for sale and for a higher price than the previous day. I checked the tickets for Friday and Saturday to see if anything was cheaper. On one of the searches, I found a ticket for $400, and I figured that it would probably be my chance to get my ticket, so I jumped at the opportunity. I went through the checkout, and then it brought me back to the homepage and said the tickets were gone.

Immediately I panicked because I was afraid someone else had swooped in, but then my email said that I had secured my ticket for Saturday!

Going to the concert was an amazing experience. He is goofy and talented, and it was wonderful to be in a crowd of people singing songs that are so meaningful. There is something freeing to be singing along to music that feels like it knows your soul. His music is ultra specific and simultaneously highly relatable and universal.

Last night, I saw someone online ask what the hype for Noah Kahan is because he thought he was a decent singer but not enough to sell out a whole tour. I think what makes Noah an enjoyable singer is that he is a regular person who talks openly about his wounds and mental health. There is a vulnerability in sharing his experience and a relatability that many of us feel, even if it's not a one-to-one correlation.

When Noah sings, "Cause if I never see you again / You can be anything I want," I don't think of someone I know who struggles with addiction, but rather my mom who doesn't have to be let into my life, and I can let her be whatever I want her to be. Give her as much power as I want her to have. I want her so much to "stay gone."

When he says, "I wish you could know me / And I wish I could know you much more sometimes," I think of my own family who doesn't always want to see the person in front of them. I wish that the vulnerability and honesty I have with my friends was transferrable to my relationships with my siblings and my dad because I don't always feel like I can be authentic with them. It's not actually me in that relationship, and I wish it was. I wish that I was valued as the person I am, and I wish I had deep connection and truth in those relationships. Maybe one day it can happen, but everyone needs to be willing and able to have those conversations and be able to listen to the other person's experiences and perspective.

When he sings, "Look at you go, crossin' state lines with your shadow / Tryna run away / Change your zip code / Turns out that you're still an asshole," I feel personally attacked. For leaving the bad things behind me and moving away. For prioritizing myself and my dreams over being complicit and small by staying somewhere where I didn't feel valued or appreciated. No longer wanting to stay in the role that never fit in the first place. I know there's a selfish label placed on me for leaving, yet if I stayed then there would have been another label placed on me by those around me. I feel like an asshole for leaving everyone else behind, yet staying meant being quiet and holding myself back for the sake of those around me.

I will stop there in spite the fact that there are numerous other lines that speak to me beyond these three songs. The Great Divide album speaks to growing and changing and how it impacts your relationships because you don't know how to communicate with those around you as a result of the changes. There can be a bitterness for leaving people behind. There can be internal struggle with feeling bad for your past actions or feeling selfish for making choices that benefit you. There can be appreciation for who you've become and wanting those you love to be able to grow and change alongside you.

Hearing all these songs live and with a crowd of other people who have their own version of what these lyrics means is impactful and important. It's a huge thank you to Noah for putting his heart out there for us to listen to and appreciate. I am grateful for the disposable income that made this experience possible.

To conclude my piece for today, I want to provide advice for anyone who doesn't think they can go to a concert alone, without someone with them. I was not the only person who went alone. The man next to me was by himself, and he was so happy and cried during some of the songs. We chatted a tiny bit, but we both were so excited for ourselves to be able to see a musician we enjoy that we didn't need to interact with anyone else. Additionally, I am a big believer that it's not worth waiting for someone else to go with you to experience something. Not everyone will have the disposable income or the availability or the desire. It's not worth sitting out because you couldn't find someone who could. Finally, if you love and appreciate an experience, you will find more value in going to it alone than with someone being forced into being somewhere. You get to make the experience what you want it to be, and no one will judge you for enjoying it in the way that makes you happy.

This advice doesn't just apply for concerts. The next time you want to see a movie or go have a meal or plan a trip, go alone and see how wonderful it is to be in your own company and make decisions that make you happy. Experience all the things you want to experience! I promise it's wonderful and worth it.